A week ago I went through my second spinal surgery, removing half of my L4 disc. A week post-op I'm still going through incredible pain with every movement. Time will tell if surgery was successful, and I'm really hoping that it will be. I've moved back in with my parents which has been it's own adventure. This was caused by unemployment caused by the back pain caused by employment. Going through this for the second time, I'm wondering if I'm not witnessing a vicious circle of events that will haunt me until I change a piece of that circle. I worry about changing those pieces though, because Nursing is all I've ever known.
Nursing fits my personality and my skills-set very well. I get to be reminded every day that I'm needed, I get to fix people, I get to feel accomplished at the end of the day. I don't know that I'm ready to give that up. I may change the way in which I'm working, but I don't think the crux of my employment will change anytime soon.
In the past year I've moved quite a few times, which has made me feel as though my life was in constant transition. I moved to Lisbon, then Iowa City, 3 apartments within Iowa City, and then back home, right where I started from. This has taught me the importance of planning and consideration in my next move. Whats important now is to get healed, get back to work, then get back into my own living space. From there I can start to rebuild my life again, but build it differently this time.
It's not important to reach every goal you set for yourself completely. Perfection doesn't exist in this universe. What is important is that you give an earnest effort, and do your damndest. Right now my goal is to get through each day. Building blocks.
I would like to move to Minneapolis and seek a job outside of healthcare within the next year. Small town livin' just isn't for me, and doesn't assist the life that I see for myself. It is necessary right now that I set the life that I see for myself on the back burner, and concentrate instead on getting a steady footing. You can't have the life you want, without first having a life to live. This is hard to accept, because I'm once again in a place where I don't really have any solid-go-to-friends. Of course there are people who I find wonderful, but it's not the same as having your besties around you. Johnnie and Ryan kept me sane in Iowa City, and kept my head from spinning around the cavalcade of characters that went in and out of my life. Here, I'm on my own.
I would like to move to Minneapolis and seek a job outside of healthcare within the next year. Small town livin' just isn't for me, and doesn't assist the life that I see for myself. It is necessary right now that I set the life that I see for myself on the back burner, and concentrate instead on getting a steady footing. You can't have the life you want, without first having a life to live. This is hard to accept, because I'm once again in a place where I don't really have any solid-go-to-friends. Of course there are people who I find wonderful, but it's not the same as having your besties around you. Johnnie and Ryan kept me sane in Iowa City, and kept my head from spinning around the cavalcade of characters that went in and out of my life. Here, I'm on my own.
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First!
(people don't really do that ^ any more, do they?)
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